March 22, 2009

Why I love Jill Nicolle Garns

In the beginning of February, I posted about Jill's recent experience with surgery. I told the story of what happened, but I didn't tell the whole story.

There was a time, before we got married, that I thought I had lost Jill forever. It was perhaps the darkest time of my life. I knew deep inside we were supposed to be together. Yet, that was impossible at the time. I struggled with the feelings inside me and the reality of the situation and finally came to some semblance of peace-of-mind. Of course, later, the situation changed, my wishes came true and I was able to marry the most beautiful, amazing woman I had ever met.

That process changed me. It made me appreciate her so much more than I would have otherwise. It also produced my biggest fear: losing her again. You see, now I drive her nuts because I want to soak up every minute I have with her. Last month's experience with her surgery was especially difficult because I felt like I came so close to losing her again. The good thing is that my appreciation for her was again increased. Shortly after the surgery was Jill's birthday. And for the last 10 days she and the kids have been in California during a school break.

These experiences over the last few weeks, and the recent time without her, have given me time to reflect on why I love her. I want the world to know why I love Jill Nicolle Garns.

  • I love her smile. There is nothing on this earth so bright and full of light.
  • She is the most caring person I know.
  • I love her tender heart and deep concern for others.
  • I love that she is an elegant lady in a world that pushes women to be brutes.
  • She is an amazing homemaker and I love that she takes such pride in keeping our home spotless, tidy, inviting, and full of warmth and love.
  • I couldn't ask for a better mother for our boys. She is a great teacher. Patient, loving, and uplifting.
  • It kills me to think of all of the physical and emotional pain that she has suffered in her life. But, I love that she has not let those things make her bitter, hateful, or angry. She chooses to be happy, full of life, and take care of others, no matter what pain she might feel.
  • I love just watching her walk. Pure grace.
  • Her kiss in the morning sustains me for the whole day.
  • Jill has eyes that immediately captive me and draw me in. I love the feeling I get when she just gives me quick glance and a wink.
  • Holding hands with Jill is an experience. She doesn't do anything halfway. And, when she holds my hand she squeezes tight! Sometimes too tight. But, I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world.
  • Jill seems to be aging in reverse. Every day she is more beautiful. How did I get so lucky?
  • I love that Jill is so forgiving. We all know how imperfect I am. And Jill still loves me and accepts me.
  • I love that Jill is a hard worker. I could never do what she does. She outworks me every day of the week.
  • Jill is committed and stays true to her word no matter what. I love that anyone can always count on her.
  • I love that Jill has unwavering faith. Her faith in God is unbreakable and her faith in others is inspiring.
  • Jill exudes charity. You can't be around her and not feel loved. If you ever need an emotional boost, just go sit by her. She'll make you feel like a million bucks.
  • Jill's beauty is timeless, elegant, inviting, warm, and bright. Her beauty extends from every ounce of her physical body to every part of her spirit. She is one of God's great masterpieces.
  • I love it when I tickle her and she tries to get angry with me. She can't hold back the smile and a little giggle.
  • I love waking up before she does and taking a moment to just look at her, embrace her, and give her a kiss on the forehead.
  • I love that Jill loves sweets. She't not a big fan of food. I think she eats just to stay alive. But she gets exceptional enjoyment out of eating anything sweet.
  • Jill is a perfectionist. In being so, she is uplifing all of us and helping us to be better. I love that she strives for perfection in all that she does and in all that she is.
  • I love her laugh.
  • I love her little tiny toes (even if they do overlap).
  • I love that she sorts my socks in alphabetical order so I can tell the black from the blue.
  • I love that she bought me a guitar so I'll learn to serenade her, even though she knows I can't sing any better than a hyena. I told you she had faith!
  • I love that she doesn't understand computers very well. It makes me feel smart when she asks for help.
  • I love that Jill has always supported my surfing habit.
  • I love that Jill is just as beautiful without make up on as she is with it on.
  • There are many thing I could say that would be completely inappropriate for a family blog, but let's just say that Jill is amazing in ALL aspects of our marriage (like holding hands).
Jill, I am grateful for many things in my life, but at the top of the list is my eternal marriage to you. I still can't believe that am lucky enough to be with you forever. I'm not sure I'll ever feel worthy, but that makes me strive to be better each day.

Jill Nicolle, I love you and I always will. Thank you for loving me back.